Azlin (seranggalover) wrote,
Azlin
seranggalover

Reflection

I am poor. So is my family.
-I have to send money back home.
-When I go home during lebaran, I have to take care of my younger siblings: Cook their meals, Wash their clothes, Help them with their homework.

Sometimes I just want to shout at my parents for having too many children and putting a lot of responsibility on me.

One evening, I sat under a tree and closed my eyes. At that time I realized what my parents have done for me but never complained. When my father was unemployed in 1990 (I was five years old), they only ate a meal a day but always made sure that I had at least 2 meals a day. They even bought me toys when I wanted to so badly even if it means that they have to starve. They wanted to have more children but they realized that they wouldn't be able to rear additional kids giving them satisfactory nutrition. But most importantly, they wanted to make me happy and not have to suffer due to siblings. How many hours, minutes, seconds did they have to take care of me? If they were not taking care of me, how many hours, minutes, seconds did they think about me just to make sure that they were doing a good job in taking care of me? I couldn't count.

Now that I am older and able to earn some money, I often complain to myself that they are asking too much from me. After reflecting upon myself under a banana tree, I feel awful now and promise that I will never complain again.
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